Marginson's fruit and veg army
Do you remember when football was fun and banter ruled the terraces? Come to that do you remember terraces? Well down at the Football Club United of Manchester we certainly do remember... because terraces, fun and banter is what we do.
Come and see us this season and find out. You won't be on your own as we average over 3,000 for our home matches and have taken thousands away. Blackpool Mechanics last season saw a low of 26 people for one game and a high of 4300. Guess who came to town that day!
So, ensure your throat is well oiled (we do a bit of the pre-match drinking of course) and get stuck in to 'Marginson's fruit and veg army!' which takes its cue name from the contents of manager and delivery driver Karl Marginson's (ex-Rotherham and Macclesfield striker) van.
Or how about a bit of Spandau Ballet's 'Gold' for striker Aidie Orr. 'Always believe in the Orr, he's got the power to score, he's indestructible,'
Then there is Steve Torpey's choice of underwear. 'We all know that Torpey wears a thong,' to the tune of Yellow Submarine.
And who can forget the classic reserved for portly opposition goalkeepers - a favourite of mine the Kaiser Chiefs' 'I Predict A Riot' has become 'I predict a diet'. We love it! We love it so much we charged £7 for adults (pay on the gate at Bury's Gigg Lane), £2 for under 18's and a fiver for over-60's. Bargain.
A word about my first article. Thanks for the great response from far and wide! A big shout out to Øyvind of Norway. Øyvind wants to know when he can join this football cultural revolution and forsake a trip to Old Trafford in favour of a bit of Rebel action.
Well Øyvind the fixtures for Moore & Co Construction Solicitors League are not out until Friday 7th July but tune in here and I will keep you updated. If you want to see a friendly then how about this;
15 July 3pm - Radcliffe Borough (a) at Stainton Park
19 July 7:45pm - Altrincham (a) at Moss Lane
22 July 3pm - AFC Wimbledon (h) at Gigg Lane in the Supporters` Direct Cup
26 July 7:45pm - Bury (a) at Gigg Lane
29 July 3pm - Sheffield FC (a) at the Don Valley Stadium
1 August 7:45pm - Halifax Town (a) at the Shay
9 August 7:45pm - Abbey Hey (a) at Abbey Stadium
Another shout out goes to Toast.... I am trying to butter him up and become a contributor. Bad pun. Apologies. Hiya Toast.
The official site can be found here FCUoM
That's all for today. The powers at Vital towers are still only giving me a short trial. Your continuing support via comments to this article or in the forum or mailed to me at email@example.com are most welcome.
I will leave you with this thought .... 'Did you hear about the new line of Elvis Presley-themed steakhouses?
They will be for people who love meat tender.'
I'm here all week!