His Holiness, Berbatov The Sacred
Dimitar Berbatov is a fine example to all young people out there - or that's what he's striving to be anyway. United's Bulgarian recruit revealed what a disturbingly good guy he is.
'I am religious and I take The Bible everywhere with me. There are many good pieces of advice for those like me in The Bible.'
I never swear in daily life - it's just a matter of good upbringing. I try to do everything with style, not only in football and if I manage to give any positive examples then that is great.'
Well, I hope he won't be so forgiving at Anfield or Stamford Bridge - being a nice guy has advantages but not at these grounds.
But we should be happy that Rooney will be paired with this guy. Yin and yang, anyone?